A Real Case of an Angry Bird

     I was about 10 years old.  My older sister, Lisa, must of been freshly 17 and still inexperienced at driving although she did have her license.  It was early summer and we were getting ready to enjoy a relaxing girls weekend up at Houghton Lake, just my mom, sister and I. 

     We decided to grab a lunch at Burger King before heading north on the highway.  Lisa pressed the button to lower the window on the 1986 Cadillac Eldorado and placed our order at the drive-thru speaker box.  She drove around the building to get our food from the window.  After obtaining our lunches Lisa pulled forward slightly to pass out the orders so the car behind can get their orders from the drive-thru window. 

     While digging into the bag to pass back my sandwich and nibbling on a few fries she noticed a seagull looking in her direction a few yards away.  She nervously laughed and said, "Look at those seagulls!  It's like they want to get in the car to take our food."

     "My mom chuckled, "It is not going to fly in our car!  They don't know we have food in here."

     Almost as if the seagull knew what my mom was saying the bird had to prove her wrong.  The seagull quickly flew up into the window and started squaking and flapping its wings.  My sister frantically hopped over onto my mom's lap tipping the drinks over screaming, "I AM BEAK TO NOSE WITH THE BIRD!"  I was in the back seat just laughing hysterically as the birds wingspan was flapping openly in the car. 

     "ROLL UP THE WINDOW" yells my mom.

     " I CAN'T!  THE BIRD IS IN THE WAY!  THE WINDOW WILL SQUISH IT" screamed my sister back.

     I am not sure if my sister kicked out the bird or if it flew out on its own, but after the bird exited the car my sister tossed the bird some fries to keep it occupied as she quickly raised up the window.  Looking back I wonder how this commotion must of looked to the car behind us as a bird flies in the car and the driver quickly flies over to the passengers seat.  It sure must of been a sight.

     We pulled out of Burger King and headed straight up to Houghton Lake.  We didn't bother cleaning up the spilled drinks at the moment.  There was several birds.  We wanted to get out of there before they all started attacking.  I think we learned a very important lesson from that incident.  When ordering from the drive-thru always look to see if birds are around.  And if they are roll the windows up first before opening up the bags!

The Box Lied

     It was early Fall of 1996.  I was in my second half of my 19th year.  My husband and I just acquired our first place.  Adult life was suddenly handed over to me whether I was ready or not.  What older people fail to tell younger people is that relationships need tweaking.  Not everything falls into place perfectly.  The husband has his ideas of how life should be and the wife has her ideas and not all the time do they match.  Disappointments and arguments soon follow.  That is not always bad - it is a part of learning each other and growing together as a couple.

     I was never a susie homemaker type of person.  As a teen I was always out working or taking part of some after-school activity or just hanging around with friends.  Home was for sleeping and grabbing a meal here and there.  When there was cooking being done by my mom I was far from it.  It just never interested me.  As a young teen I remember thinking Why cook when there are so many resturants around.  When I met my husband I worked as a waitress at a resturant.  I could serve food but I just couldn't prepare it.  I could fix up smaller things - popcorn, a bowl of cereal, scrambled eggs (not fried or hard boiled), box mix cake, tv dinners and pot pies.  If it pretty much came prepackage I could do it.  My husband must of thought that all women just knew how to cook.  It was somehow in our DNA.  The women in his life were all decent cooks.  His stepmom even owned a resturant!  Women and food just naturally went together.  My working in a resturant must of made him think that I enjoyed being in the kitchen.  Nope!  I proved him wrong about women and the kitchen.  

     One evening I went to prepare the meal.  One perk of being a wife of an over-the-road truck driver was that I didn't have to cook very often.  Or cook to impress that is.  I opened up a box of mac-n-cheese and prepared it just as the directions said.  I put a little in a bowl for me (I just like eating mine out of a bowl) and a little in a bowl for him.  He looks down at the cheesie noodles, "What else are we having with it?" 

     Having WITH it?!  The idea never crossed my mind!  I blankly looked at him and told him this was dinner.  He went on to inform me that mac-n-cheese is not a dinner, it is a side dish!  I thought for a moment.  Mac-n-cheese sounded good.  I didn't know what else he wanted.  I held up the empty box, "It is TOO a dinner.  See," I show him the box, "It says so right here!"  I even pointed to the word dinner.

 

     I don't really remember what happened next if he went off to his mom's for some real food or if he went out to eat.  I remember sitting back and enjoying my bowl of mac-n-cheese shocked that someone just couldn't like it as it was.  Then I looked at the big picture.  I HAD to learn how to cook.  I am going to have to fix dinners for the rest of my life and find something to please my husband with!  The thought of trying to learn to cook made my stomach turn, either that or I put too much butter in with the mac-n-cheese.  I couldn't tell which. 

     The next week I tried cooking up ham steaks for us using a cookbook.  400 degrees and an hour later they were a little crispy.  Again, my husband was disappointed as he tried to fork out the charred piece of what was once a ham steak from the pan.  I think the Lord must of heard his plea for help because a few moments later his friend and his wife came by and wondered if we wanted to join them for pizza at a local resturant.  Finally, something edible!

     Around the same time I had a friend from college come over to help me fix a dinner for my husband.  She had to help me learn to brown hamburger.  I have never done it before.  Something as simple as browning hamburger was a clueless process to me years ago.  I was so impressed by how easy it was.  My mom has browned hamburger a zillion times but I never watched her do it.  I never even gave the matter thought until then.  I didn't care how it was done.  I just wanted the finished product. 

     I have come a long way since then.  Meatloaf took me about 10 times to get that right.  Chicken - well, I have perfected it but I did it so wrong so many times that my husband cringes when I mention about fixing it.  Now everything is like second nature.  Even my mom is impressed that make my own granola and homemade biscuits and jellies.  I am no Chef Gordon Ramsey by any means but a lot more of my meals impress my husband.  Mararoni and cheese is no longer a dinner at our house.  For lunch? well...that is another story. 

  

A Movie Night Special

     Think back to a time before Hulu or YouTube.  A time before there were hundred's of mindless television shows on satellite or cable.  DVD's were unheard of and VCR's were just starting to make its debut.  TV mostly consisted of 3 to 4 stations and if you were lucky you may have even squeezed an extra station on the lower dials.  Some know what I am talking about and if you do then you can remember a time when a movie night was a family event.

     Around every holiday you can expect to see some type of Charlie Brown show.  Christmas time was especially grand because not only was there a Charlie Brown show but a myriad of other Christmas specials.  During the summer a station would host a regular movie to show like "Wizard of Oz" or "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory".  Everybody would be settled in to view it.  There was usually a child or two the next day who was disappointed in the fact that they missed the show and had to wait a whole year to try to catch it again.  The year was worth the wait.

     Mom would bathe us early and we would slip into our jammies.  She would lay a sheet out on the livingroom floor and make up some Kool-aid.  Usually it was grape or cherry.  Right before the movie would start mom would pull out a pan to pop up some popcorn on the stove.  Microwave popcorn was unheard of back then.  Excitedly, my brother, sister and I would run between watching the popcorn in the kitchen and checking with the tv in the livingroom to see if any of the movie started yet.  My mom lounged out on the couch and my sibilings and I had our own little picnic on the layed out sheet with our popcorn and Kool-aid. 

     Before you knew it, right at a good part, a commercial would appear.  At times it would be too suspenseful and the wait for the show was agony.  Other times a commercial break allowed for a quick trip to the bathroom or a discussion about what movie was showing. 

     Today you can boot up any movie or rent them commercial free.  I think the movies have lost their appeal.  It can be watched anytime.  Some stations still try to keep up with tradition but kids today don't want to be bothered by commercials.  When I watch a show from a DVD I can still tell where the commercial breaks are and I still expect that the movie would pause at that point. There isn't a fuss made about a movie on tv because somewhere in the hundreds of channels there is probably other movies showing.  Time marches on and it is a different world we live in today but I am thankful that I have these to hold dear to my heart. 

Oh My Goodness!!! I Said What To Whom???

     With Super Tuesday Primary Elections going on today I couldn't help but reminisce about my first political interaction.  No, it isn't a proud moment in my past but rather of some embarrassment as I look back on the moment.  Only certain things happening in the world caught my attention: Berlin Wall coming down, perhaps some natural disasters of earthquakes or tornado's but never politics.  When I was a child I remember Oliver North being on every channel during the summer talking about selling something to the Contra's over some hostages.  All I knew was that he was interrupting my summertime cartoons.  This was the down side of not having cable.

     Zoom ahead to the year 1995.  I was 18 and a senior in high school.  We just moved across state from Saginaw to Grandville.  At school I was in a program called "Close-Up" which centered around seeing how the government worked and we got to go to Washington D.C.   For me it was a trip to D.C. - a town rich full of history and I wasn't a bit interested in the politics of it.  I was barely pulling a C- in Government class as it was and I had to pass that to get my high school degree. 


I was the 3rd one from the left. 

     We were on our way back from a week in Washington D.C. when our plane encountered some bad weather.  It was delayed for several hours.  We were supposed to return around 9pm but we actually didn't arrive at the high school until 2am.  The teachers made it clear that since they had to be in the classroom in a few hours that they expected all of us to be in the classrooms as well.  I did what any entitled high schooler would do.  I begged my mom to call in for me so I could sleep in.  She said I was 18 and I could call in for myself and that she wasn't going to.  I didn't call in nor did my mom so the school considered that I skipped.  For my punishment I got one hour of out of school suspension (OSS) for each hour I skipped.  Basically the school rewarded me with an extra day off.  Cool.  I could use an extra day off.  No problem!

     My mom didn't see the humor in it.  She dragged me to her office in the state building the next morning to help out with case files and other office work.  This was torture.  Put me back in school!  Wasn't there child labor laws to protect me from this torment?!  The day was long and boring.  I was dozing off fast.  

     I had myself drapped across the office chair, head tilted back and possible drool dripping off my cheek.  I heard my mother talking and laughing with someone.  Then I heard these words, "You better be nice to me because you are coming up for re-election."  

     I sat up and looked over at him rudely interrupting, "WHO ARE YOU?"  

     The mystery man responded proudly, "I am Ken Sikkema, Michigan State House of Representatives for the Grandville 74 District." 

Ken Sikkema Majority Floor Leader, Michigan State House of Representatives 1995-1996
Representative, Michigan State House of Representatives, District 74, 1986-1998

     Before I continue with the dialog I want to flash back a few weeks prior.  In Government class we had a test over who was who in our government.  Who was our Governor, Lt. Governor, Sec. of State, our district senator and representative and all the way down to other local Grandville officials.  Since I was new to Grandville and at the time I really didn't care at all for politics so to put it bluntly I failed that test.  Back to the conversation...

     I straightened myself up in the chair and my face just beamed with excitment.  Before I could think and with my finger pointing right at him I opened my big mouth and proudly stated, "I JUST FLUNKED YOUR NAME ON MY GOVERNMENT TEST!!!" 

     After I said that I realized that wasn't the best way to make a first impression.  He laughed, shook my hand and said he hoped that after this meeting I will pass his name next time.  I soon realized what a scene that must of been with Mr. Sikkema talking with my mom and here I was snoozing away across the office chair behind her.  It has been 17 years and I still haven't forgot who he was.